My new original country song "No Greater Love". Would...
Once upon a time when nothing mattered at all
Just walking through this life, without a care in the world
All that really mattered then was all about me
But then in time, I would soon come to see
This greater love, so much bigger than me
Back then I was so naïve to the meaning of life
Spending all my time carefree just me and my wife
But then it happened suddenly this angel arrived
A kind of love that you just can’t describe
A deeper feeling, that you know won’t subside
(Chorus)
There’s no greater love than the love for your child
There’s no greater gift that makes you wanna smile
And in your heart, they will always be there
The kind of love that you almost can’t bear
The love for your child
This feeling that you have inside will last for all time
It’s funny how this song of life starts to finally rhyme
I never thought I’d die for someone else, in this world
And in your soul, this complete and utter love
This precious gift, sent from way up above
(Chorus)
There’s no greater love than the love for your child
There’s no greater gift that makes you wanna smile
And in your heart, they will always be there
The kind of love that you almost can’t bear
The love for your child
(Bridge)
There’s nothing that compares to those butterfly kisses
Not even the life and love you share with the missus
To love somebody more than life and more than yourself
Until the end, unconditionally
When they arrive, you will soon come see
(Chorus)
There’s no greater love than the love for your child
There’s no greater gift that makes you wanna smile
And in their heart, you will always be there
The kind of love that you almost can’t bear
The love for your child
The love for your child
The love for your child
Joseph M. Loforte Copyright © 2017
Replies
James Porterfield
Hey Joe, I just got a chance to listen to this and its a very pretty song! You should submit this for pro critique through our system and see if any of the pro writers might have some input or advice! Hope all is well with you!
7 years ago
Joe Loforte
Hi Scott thank you for taking the time to listen. Much appreciated !!! I had posted another song as well prior to this post. Thanks again and have a happy holiday and new year !!!
7 years ago
Tyler Hunt
Hello Joe. Great song! There are some great melodies in this song. After listening to your song a few times through the main thing I would like to say is that I felt that your rhyme scheme needed to change throughout the song. You don't have perfect rhymes in most of the places and that helps, but in many places you have an aabb rhyme scheme going on. I would suggest trying, and see if you like it and see if it helps or doesn't, but try to switch up the verse rhyme scheme with the chorus rhyme scheme. With songwriting, I think that contrast is key to maintaining your listeners. Try an abab in the verse or abaa or something different than the chorus. Number of lines can also help. I think you did a great job with that. The chorus I liked, so maybe keep the chorus but find something to contrast it in the verses. Also, maybe finding a different harmony rhythm in the chorus or verse again to help contrast the sections. Again, great song, very strong melodies , you have a great topic to base this song on, I suggest just trying to find things to make each section slightly different. Awesome work! Can't wait to hear more...
7 years ago